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Wednesday, June 2, 2010

What Are You Certain Of?


Right when we were having this done (installing new flooring...)  #2 Son pops back into our life.  "He's baaccccccccccccckkkkk." And yes, this time I'm in agreement with My Guy.  I know I'll have more than a few who disagree with our choice.  But!  Come walk in our shoes....for just a day.  This young man is so down and out and on top of his wrong choices; add learning disabilties.  What's a person to do?

Now, #2 Son has had a firm foundation: parents who love him.  Parents together (and still goo-goo) after 33 years.  A church home.  Where I'm going with this is...sometimes it just doesn't matter WHAT type of parent you are.  Now, many of my friends did it right.  Their kids are very successful and their growing up years were not dramatic, tragic or even troublesome.  However,  I am certain that sometimes a raging alcoholic can parent the Valedictorian.  The preacher can raise a crack head.  Just because you look a "certain" way, live in a "certain" home, drive a "certain" car...nothing, nada in life is CERTAIN! 

And so...while the work was going on; a friend suggested the new flooring could be a metaphor.  Someone else writes of the spiritual connections in our home.  I like this idea; and so I tootled around to catch more metaphors.  I use a lot of "risers."  It's a decorating trick, you know.  You can't just plop things down.  There's got to be interest....use risers - books, pedestals, whatever you can.

(My favorite riser:  books; especially old....)

My prayer is for #2 Son to rise - out of his pit!  My Guy and I read an article recently about Derek Steele.  This "YouTube" will rock your world!  He's written a book "Addict at 10..."  His story is nothing short of a miracle.  He ends this video:  "...with as many (chances) as it takes to get it right."  That hit me like a brick.  I'm buying his book today.  Won't use IT as a riser; but perhaps I can get it into the hands of my son and it will help him...rise.  19.  The world (could be) open for the taking.  Yet, our boy's foundation is oh so uncertain.  Good friends and family know everything....I'm pretty much an open book.  But, on this blog, I'm keeping some of his "stuff" private.  Suffice it to say; today - his future is bleak.  He cannot see...

(find the "risers")

...the light at the end of the tunnel.  Yet, he's got a Mom and Dad who love him.  Who allow him a home to live in (as long as he adheres to "certain" rules).

Mother's instincts are quite often spot on.  In my gut, I know this is right.  For today.  Which takes me to the train of thought I am certain of.  Sitting on my desk in front of me is "Calm My Anxious Heart" by Linda Dillow.  I've read and reread it; hightlighted many passages.  A quote from George MacDonald will certainly help me today:

"It has been well said that no man ever sank under the burden of the day.  It's when tomorrow's burden is added to the burden of today that the weight is more than a man can bear.  Never load yourselves so, my friends.  If you find yourselves so loaded, at least remember this: it is your own doing, not God's.  He begs you to leave the future to Him and to mind the present."


The moral of this post:  tile floors are easy living and living one day at a time is the only way to go.  I am certain of that!

xoxo




15 comments:

Gary said...

Wow Virginia. You continue to amaze me with your writing. This is another example, and I am moved again. Of course, I may be impacted more since I live in your world.

Love You - My Guy

Vava (aka Virginia) said...

To My Guy: I'm goo-goo still and thankful we have one another to go through life with...

Dawn said...

I too am so thankful that the two of you have each other...who better to walk through the "muck" sometimes, and the ONE holding both of you is the ONE who knows and loves you most...praying for your sweet boy Vava...xoxo

sewmuchwhimsy said...

Va, I just love that quote...I have to remind myself to stay present about 10 times a day, some days! xoxoxo Gretchen

Anonymous said...

VAVA, love those tile floors. I put them in our house in the country in 2005 and have never looked back. and yes they are dog hair friendly. wish I could put them in D. oh well another day.
Sooooooooo sorry your days are anxious. Sooooo sorry #2 can't find his way. He has the whole world in front of him, so easy for us to see. Is the military still an option? Does #1 offer any help? keep fluffing my friend and I'll keep praying. you are so deserving of the calm.
xoxox FRANCO

Pam said...

Stay tight with that guy of yours....he's a keeper! Thinking of you...

Dianne said...

Virginia Dear, you really blew my mind away with this post!!! Your writing is amazing. Your life holds so many bessings and you are smart to see them. I love the quote and am working on that very thing right now as I read THE POWER OF NOW. I pray for #2 son and know that one day all will be well!

Girl Meets Paris said...

One of the most important things I've learned as a parent (and it took many years) is the only 3 people that have to agree with a choice when it comes to our kids, is the husband, the wife, and the Lord. No one understands a child like his/her parents. We ALL make mistakes... we ALL make great decisions... we are ALL just human.

I love how you mentioned the preacher, and the alcoholic. It's so true. It's that darn free will that gets our kids... hey, it gets us too. No one is perfect.

I'm rambling... so I will just say... I will pray for you and yours.

Peaches said...

As usual,you are amazing!!!

jen said...

Great writing. I'm so sorry you're struggling so with your son.
But I loved what you said about doing everything right as a parent and kids still making choices. Good for you to know that.
Thinking of you.

Emily said...

Hugs to you Vava. One thing I am certain of......your home is so lovely!

Vava (aka Virginia) said...

You all are wonderful! Jen - it's ok (son-issue). Truly...it's "been" since was 3. Nothing new in our life. It is what it is! :)
xoxo to ALL!!!!!!!

martha said...

ok this post ROCKS! I do hope things have calmed a bit for #2 and you....will keep you in prayer..
The comparisons with household are spot on! Maybe the new floors is signif too-which are pretty btw...new FIRMER footings? HUGS to you!
AN these photos are all so mag worthy, dear!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Morning T said...

Your home looks beautiful Vava!

moondiva said...

Love you and your guy and your boys...all will be well...just work hard and let God!