Follow Me on Pinterest

Saturday, June 2, 2012


He is poetry to me.  Strong, yet restrained.  Calm and accepting.  Loving.  So filled with love, that in his presence, I can sense it.  We don't get to hold him, hug him, or even peck him on the cheek.  But the love was pinging all around us.

We had 90 minutes today...which is 30 extra.  He wears a blue smock now - an outward signal that he is a leader.  They call those in blue "Structure."  He had to be voted on among his peers and the promotion brings perks:  more visiting time, first in line at chow.

My Guy snapped a picture while we were waiting.  What you may not be able to see is the smile.  This picture speaks a thousand words.  My boy behind bars, held back, fenced in, restricted, guarded.  You can see where this is going...

And so from here we were let in through the gate to a large room - set up in a "U" - where we sat across from #2 Son.  I then became a prisoner....restrained, held back, forbidden.  To touch.  {I did sneak a hand holding when I was sure the guard's gaze was averted}.  

I stared at him.  He looked good.  No, actually GREAT - with a touch of sunburn/tan to his face...which made him appear healthy.  As I looked at him, I couldn't help but watch him watch My Guy, his Dad.  

We womenfolk tend to notice what our guys may not.  #2 Son rarely took his eyes off of his Dad.  He'd catch me staring and I'd wink.  I wanted to capture his face on film SO badly.

My Guy has been over-the-top supportive these past 7 months and #2 Son now knows the love his Dad has for him.  I'VE known of it, but #2 Son perceived a lack.  

An interesting way to spend a Saturday: arrive early, spend an hour listening to a counselor, then 90 minutes with him.  There were varying degrees of emotion.  Faces of frustration, smiles of forgiveness, and unconditional love.   A mish-mash of humanity!

We have June, July, August and 10 days in September to ramp up and become strong and able.  He'll return home to us.  Transformed. This journey is not only about him, though.  My Guy and I must be transformed.  

What is my take-away today?  Well, appreciate what you've got people.  A dear friend is going through a very rough season with her very ill husband.  She asks us to do the same: do not take anything for granted.  I don't.

I thank God for my family.  My Guy, My Sons and the extended peeps I love.  

Blessed am I!  And in a few months, our family will be FREE. 



gretchen said...

You are amazing. Enough said. oxxo

Pam said...

Va...I agree with Gretchen. Amazing woman you are!!

Dianne said...

Oh what your words say is so powerful. Amazing for sure!!!
Love you so! xoxoxo

Privet and Holly said...

V, you are SO
strong and I am
certain that when
your son comes
home, you will
all be ready to
move forward.

I felt that special
mother-son LOVE
leap from your words.
That first hug will
be manna....

xo Suzanne

Farmgirl Paints said...

don't know the story. that's okay. you're a good momma. this post overflowed with love. i'm rooting for your family:)

martha said...

you are transparent and wise. and He is transforming....and will redeem!

Tikaa Herridge-Cone said...

I agree with all the comments, but want to add that your honesty is eye opening. I love that you are so honest about your son, it seems like (at least online) so many people are not as open and honest about what is going on in their lives. Your story and how you are standing by your son will be an inspiration to others. Honest bloggers are the best.

Green Acres
I'm adding you to my blog list